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Discussion Starter #1
They are out in flocks. And not in cages. I entered the parking lot of my work and encountered a large flock huddling around the handicapped parking area. I approached rather slowly. I went to go aroudn them (10 yard gap), plenty of room right? For being like 80, they move quick. The flock scattered in random directions. I wasn't traveling fast but decided to continue my path. One got fairly close as I finally passed. By close I mean within 5 feet. Whatever right...

15 minutes into my shift, manager calls me aside all concerned. Didnt even think anything of it. Says a lady is here to see me and he told her I'm not available. She threatened him with calling the police. Thats when I asked what she looked like...low and behold...it was one of them. He then told me he won't make me go out there and he'll tell her again I'm not available. I said no, I'll just go out and see what her problem is. I assumed I spooked her maybe and I'll apologize and be over with it, even though I knew it was all fine.

Lady had an eye patch. I rolled my eyes as I approached her. With poor depth perception I'm sure I really spooked her. For once in my life, I rather courtious and polite. Saying I apologize for my behavior and whatever else would make her go away. She ripped into me with that old woman voice. I'm a baby compared to here at 24 years of age. Telling me about **** kids and their motorcycles and no respect. I stood there. I took it. She then demanded a note of apology. Ok, if that'll make her go away. I bring out a brief note in my worst hand writing.

Still not enough. She tells me she is going to call the cops anyways. I wanted to tell her tto just do it and good luck. I have multiple friends in the local departments, I'm a criminal justice major and in the application process to be a LEO myself. There was nothing that could legally be done and I knew this. So I let her go on with her rant. Yes ma'am. No ma'am. Won't happen again ma'am.

THEN she goes into how her friend is shaking in the car (also an elderly woman), again I apologize and ask whats her name and I include it in the note. Is this enough, hag? Again, she tries guilt. Telling me I hit her friends purse. Uh huh right...the entire time much of my co-workers are behind the bar laughing. Laughing as I stood there with good posture and being polite as possible. Finally she left. I shook my head and dealt with the onslought of co-workers wanting to know what the dilly that was all about.

I half wished she called the police, and wathc it turn out to be one of my friends. But back to work I went. Leaving work I expected some form of old lady vandalism on my bike. Whatever that might be.

They are out. Keep watch...I'm glad my life is getting exciting again, whether its negative or positive.
 

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That story somehow reminded me of A Clockwork Orange, except it didn't end with you tolchocking her in the gulliver while your droogs smecked all bazoomy! ;D
 

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That's how the old ladies hit on the youngsters.

She was all yours.

You coulda had her, and her shakeing friend.

If you can mimick Matlock, you could have had all of them.



;)
 

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Discussion Starter #6
That story somehow reminded me of A Clockwork Orange, except it didn't end with you tolchocking her in the gulliver while your droogs smecked all bazoomy! ;D
Ya know, I can totally see it.
 

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I can not stand old drivers. Reason being, I pretty much live in a retirement state and I drive 8 to 10 hours a day so I get to see a ton of elderly drivers. It is not rare to have a close call once or twice a day. I think elderly drivers are among some of the worse drivers out there. People should have to retest for their drivers license once they hit a certain age. I just wish I could tell some of my stories. lol
 

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I can not stand old drivers. Reason being, I pretty much live in a retirement state and I drive 8 to 10 hours a day so I get to see a ton of elderly drivers. It is not rare to have a close call once or twice a day. I think elderly drivers are among some of the worse drivers out there. People should have to retest for their drivers license once they hit a certain age. I just wish I could tell some of my stories. lol
What's stopping you from telling your stories? :ears:
 

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BannedCampCounselor
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I applaud your restraint, Nate.
You could have easily told that lady to go stick her cane up her wrinkly ******* but you didnt. Instead, you stood there and took one for the team.

So she thought you hit her friends purse while you were pulling into the parking lot on the Z? I'd have told her that if I had touched her purse, I would most-likely have stolen it and rode off- but since she is still in possession of said purse, the contact never happened....
and then you should have rode circle-wheelies around them while shouting "SATAN".
 

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Discussion Starter #13
I think she was implying that I was so close that the wind of me going by moved the purse...she was clearly senile though. Given the eyepatch and the repeated statements "I'm gonna call the cops anyways". Yes ma'am, you do that...waste your time and mine.

I wasnt going to bother talking reason. I knew I wasnt that close. However being over the age of 80, my Z is loud, I'm sure I did spook them. I bet she went back to all her friends and told them she straightened out that reckless sonofab1tch.
 

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Good story man. Old people are scared of everything.

My mom was telling me about it the other day. My parents are in their mid and late 50's, retired, very active (run a couple miles/ day), but she was telling me how she can start to relate to seniors. It's a lack of confidence thing that makes them terrified of everything. Thank God my parents still have some good years left.
 

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Lifer
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How the story should have gone:

"So this old bitty confronts me with some jive nonsense and I come at her quick... with nothing less than a kick to the baby maker. If she was pregnant before, she's not now. Anyways, after she fell to the ground I made a nice fist for all of her bingo lovin' posse to see and asked "Who's next?" followed by a "Didn't think so." Business was handled and justice was served."

EDIT: Stick it to the Double-A-R-P and their Dia-bit-tis.
 

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Good story.... but it needs more knee blasting.
 
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