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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
After being so nearly killed last week, and staring down 6 months of healing and rehab, emotions are really running strong. As I'm sure many of you can imagine, they're strongest with my wife and daughter.

I know it'll be difficult to get back on a bike, and I don't really want to think about it while I'm laid up...but I'm sure I don't want to abandon it.

With my family it's a different story. They insist that they could never live with the fear of this happening again...and unfortunately I understand how they feel. Part of me knows it would be foolish and maybe even unfair to them to continue riding when I've so clearly demonstrated the risks.

Just wondering if any of you have been through this sort of situation and if and how you bounced back without hurting your family. I'm wondering if time will heal this as well.
 

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They are justifiably upset, but what happened to you could have just as easily happened while you were in a car. Most likely with less injury if your same incident was repeated. If you want to ride again it's going to take some real work on convincing them of that. But hey, if all else fails, TRACKDAYS!!
 

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I tell everyone who asks how I can ride again after my accident that they wouldnt stop driving because of a car accident and they can be just as bad or worse than motorcycle accidents.
 

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I tell everyone who asks how I can ride again after my accident that they wouldnt stop driving because of a car accident and they can be just as bad or worse than motorcycle accidents.

Exactly. Friend lost his brother back in 92 in a bike accident. His parents still blame the bike. Never mind HE lost control of the bike and went into the ditch and hit a tree. I doubt they'd be blaming his car if he happened to do the same in his car.
 

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I don't know the details of your accident, but have you considered track riding? (I am assuming your accident was on the street) It is a ton of fun and safer.

May run in to more problems though. For some reason when I mention going to the track everyone looks at me like I'm nots. I don't know what makes people think tracks are so dangerous, but the certainly do.

Best wishes with what ever you decide.
 

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They are justifiably upset, but what happened to you could have just as easily happened while you were in a car. Most likely with less injury if your same incident was repeated.

I wouldn't say that. Yeah, people get hit from behind in a car all the time, but it seems the general public has a much harder time noticing motorcycles. And what would be a minor fender bender between cars is far more likely to seriously injure or kill a motorcyclist. I've been in Stinnett's position with my wife. My crash was just a slow lowside and I walked away without a scratch, but she still tried to make me quit riding. I used a line something like, "If I crash the car do I have to quit driving too?". And I brought up the fact that she had been seriously injured in a car crash once while I walked away with nothing worse than ripped pants and a rashed bike. But if I'm being honest with myself, I have to admit that the risk is much greater if something goes wrong on a motorcycle. Especially if it's me vs. a car, truck, or any other large, solid object. Not sure of what I'd do if I were in Stinnett's situation, but if I had a child depending on me and had been injured that badly I'd have to at least consider giving it up. I know my wife will never get my obsession and why I think the risk is worth it. The general "motorbikes is dangerous" public will never get it. And I'm okay with that. But I wouldn't want my child worrying about whether Daddy's coming home unharmed, and I wouldn't want to think about what it'd be like for my child to grow up fatherless.
 

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life is dangerous, as i'm sure you know, but you have to live it. the level of risk we accept varies and of course only you, (and your family), can make the final decision, but one thing to consider is the quality of life for you and your family if you give up something you enjoy and become angry and bitter as a result. not that this has to happen, but it's a possibility.
 

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Been through it, and well, I am still riding and now my wife has her license, msf courses under her belt, along with an 05 ninja. We work relatively close to one another, so we usually ride our bikes into work and meet up afterwards. Still hear crap every morning from my mother though...lol
 

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Anyone who can be dissuaded from riding, should be dissuaded.
Family is the trickiest to fend off. I remember my mom and I had a teary conversation when she found out I bought a bike.
 

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We all have to make decisions based on priorities. I gave up riding for 14 years because of family obligations. Nobody was begging me to quit, and it was originally because of finances. It is possible to live a happy life without motorcycles. If you decide to move on, do it without regrets. If the time comes later that riding comes back into your life, as it did to mine, enjoy that also.

I'm not suggesting that you should give up riding, just that it really is okay to do so if that is what is best in your life.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
 

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I tell everyone who asks how I can ride again after my accident that they wouldnt stop driving because of a car accident and they can be just as bad or worse than motorcycle accidents.
Except driving a car isn't nearly as much of a luxury as riding a motorcycle. In our society, motorcycles are toys and not nearly as much of a "necessity" as a car is. So of course the people you say that to would be unwilling to give up their cars... they probaby rely on them. I'm guessing that you don't rely on your bike nearly as much as they rely on their cars.

Face the facts, guys... no matter how you want to spin it, riding a motorcycle puts you at FAR MORE RISK of serious injury than driving a car.

If you love it, you love it, it becomes a part of you and you're unlikely to be yourself if you had to give it up. That's the only justification I can think of that makes any possible sense.

Everyone accepts different levels of risk. It's up to us to take off the blinders and actually be honest about how much risk we're accepting. Most of us are too stubborn to admit to ourselves just how risky our beloved motorcycling obsessions actually are. To be perfectly honest, as much as my obsession has become who I am and as much as I hate to think about it, if/when I get married and start raising a family, I will very likely give up street riding and possibly roadracing in order to give my family the best possible chance of being taken care of. Once they're not so reliant on me, I'll probably get back into it.

Track days and dirt riding, however, are a different story. ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
You guys make a lot of good points, I appreciate the responses.

As far as the crash details, I was rear ended by a truck which was traveling well over the limit and weaving thru traffic on a four lane road. He didn't see me as he whipped around a car to find me slowing for a right turn. I was fully geared, but I was struck very hard, thrown to the road and then ran over and drug a substantial distance.

What I've considered is sticking to a dirt bike for a while. Maybe when some time has passed everyone will be able to deal with street riding again.
 

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I wouldn't say that. Yeah, people get hit from behind in a car all the time, but it seems the general public has a much harder time noticing motorcycles. And what would be a minor fender bender between cars is far more likely to seriously injure or kill a motorcyclist. I've been in Stinnett's position with my wife. My crash was just a slow lowside and I walked away without a scratch, but she still tried to make me quit riding. I used a line something like, "If I crash the car do I have to quit driving too?". And I brought up the fact that she had been seriously injured in a car crash once while I walked away with nothing worse than ripped pants and a rashed bike. But if I'm being honest with myself, I have to admit that the risk is much greater if something goes wrong on a motorcycle. Especially if it's me vs. a car, truck, or any other large, solid object. Not sure of what I'd do if I were in Stinnett's situation, but if I had a child depending on me and had been injured that badly I'd have to at least consider giving it up. I know my wife will never get my obsession and why I think the risk is worth it. The general "motorbikes is dangerous" public will never get it. And I'm okay with that. But I wouldn't want my child worrying about whether Daddy's coming home unharmed, and I wouldn't want to think about what it'd be like for my child to grow up fatherless.
A. I have no kids so you could definitively say I have no clue (and I would understand too) - but my take on this is kids grow up to be people on day too.. and you if you show you kids that it's okay to give up something you love for something else you love they will likely grasp that and run with it like millions of people do.

B. But I think if you show your kids its better to hold on to something you love, regardless of its nature (be it dangerous or whatever) they will learn a lot more from that and hopefully grow up to be passionate about something themselves- maybe even motorcycling.

There is a lot to be said for sacrificing your passion's for another's comfort but in the end does that really help to make them a better person or just a more "comfortable" one...

I think this "comfort" perhaps (see "A" above hehe) is where all these 16 year old kids screeching tires behind you at 90mph in daddy's SUV come from.
 

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Yeah, I've discussed this a few times, and it's a bit of a sore topic with my dad. He gave up riding back in the 70s cuz he was expecting his first child. He explained his reasons for quiting riding (same as quiting smoking), as what if he were to die or be unable to provide because of a crash (i.e. physical handicap or death)? This possibility weighed on him tremendously, and he sold his triumph bonneville.
3 hours later my grandmother got a phone call saying my dad is dead, when it was really the dude who bought the bike. This strengthened his resolve to not ride anymore and that was that. His view on me riding, well, that's something he came to terms with. My ladyfriend is also learning to deal with it as I crash sometimes on track days :p

It's a choice you must make keeping your family in mind. When I start reproducing, my riding will be drop abruptly as risk taking will rank lower than family. Once kids are grown and gone im gonna get more into it than before as long as finances can support.


Sent from my iPhone using Motorcycle
 

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Except driving a car isn't nearly as much of a luxury as riding a motorcycle. In our society, motorcycles are toys and not nearly as much of a "necessity" as a car is. So of course the people you say that to would be unwilling to give up their cars... they probaby rely on them. I'm guessing that you don't rely on your bike nearly as much as they rely on their cars.

Face the facts, guys... no matter how you want to spin it, riding a motorcycle puts you at FAR MORE RISK of serious injury than driving a car.

If you love it, you love it, it becomes a part of you and you're unlikely to be yourself if you had to give it up. That's the only justification I can think of that makes any possible sense.

Everyone accepts different levels of risk. It's up to us to take off the blinders and actually be honest about how much risk we're accepting. Most of us are too stubborn to admit to ourselves just how risky our beloved motorcycling obsessions actually are. To be perfectly honest, as much as my obsession has become who I am and as much as I hate to think about it, if/when I get married and start raising a family, I will very likely give up street riding and possibly roadracing in order to give my family the best possible chance of being taken care of. Once they're not so reliant on me, I'll probably get back into it.

Track days and dirt riding, however, are a different story. ;)
I disagree with you to an extent. First, many people rely on motorcycles as their only means of transportation. Second, while there are more risks once you are in an accident, I think its actually easier to avoid an accident on a motorcycle if you are skilled and alert about your surroundings. Since my accident, I have had a few cars try to put me at risk but I have been prepared for them every time and have had my escape route ready. Motorcycles are a lot more maneuverable than cars are. So I dont think driving a motorcycle necessarily puts you at far more risk. All it takes is one bad accident to end your life or permanently disable you in a car or on a motorcycle. This is why I am doing all I can to protect myself by taking more classes and hopefully doing some track days to improve my skills as a rider. How many people do you know that take more classes to improve their driving skills unless they are court mandated? And the court mandated ones are just about the laws of the road. No practical skills are taught. The lax restrictions on getting a license in this country and keep it have a lot to do with how dangerous it is on the road here no matter what your vehicle of choice.
 

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i am utterly selfish when it comes to things like this. If someone told me that I shouldn't do something because of their "feelings" they would find that I am no longer a part of their life.



... it's okay to give up something you love for something else you love...
I really hope you mean "give up the kids for motorcycles" :p
 

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My solution has been simple. A 1 Mil Accidental Death policy for under $250/year.

Money can't bring happiness, but it's a lot more comfortable to cry in a Porsche.

With that said, if I had kids, I'd not ride. Riding is actually one of the reasons I don't.
 
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