"Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up."
"(317): I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
(317): And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt"
"(281): I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
(936): haha now u have to **** out ur bum"
(847): if brad doesn't come out of the closet soon, i'm going to pull him out of it.
Jess been posting her texts?
Lol, this guys day just got worse. :lmao:
(805): Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
(1-805): Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.