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...is no fun!
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Lax,

Since you felt this was off topic in the religion thread, I made one all for you. Now it's relevant! :eek:ccasion14:

For those of you not up to speed, here's how we got here.

In my relationship, my wife likes girls so we invite one into the bedroom from time to time. We both agree to it so is it still cheating then and therefore wrong?
So back to this swinger/open marriage thing you have going on. Is this just a quarterly bring a gal home kind of thing or an embellished one time in band camp kind of thing? Who initiates it? Do you turn to MrsLax and say, "honey I'd like some strange this weekend"? Does she look at you and say, "I'm not feeling the penor this weekend babe, let's go find a friend"? Who gets final say on the girl? Is it just girls or are you an equal opportunity couple? Do you ever surprise her with someone you picked up? ("Happy Birthday sweetie, I got you a redhead!") Inquiring minds want to know.
Irrelevent to the discussion
 

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I've got to show my wife this thread... (fingers crossed) :icon_biggrin:
 

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Lax, if you and your wife are both happy with it then who cares.

People these days are way to involved in what goes on in another persons bedroom. If one believes it to be wrong, don't do it. Really it is that simple.
 

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...is no fun!
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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Lax, if you and your wife are both happy with it then who cares.

People these days are way to involved in what goes on in another persons bedroom. If one believes it to be wrong, don't do it. Really it is that simple.
I'm not making a judgement call - I'm curious about the mechanics.
 

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Lax, if you and your wife are both happy with it then who cares.

People these days are way to involved in what goes on in another persons bedroom. If one believes it to be wrong, don't do it. Really it is that simple.
Oh definitely dont care. A lot of people wish they could do things the way we do but you have to have an extremely high level of trust in order to do it. A lot of people are too jealous to be able to handle it or the guys are idiots and just use it as an excuse to sleep with someone else. The only thing that annoys me is when people try to say we have an open marriage. It just implies we go around sleeping with other people on our own which is not true at all. We dont do anything unless its together and we agree upon the girl. Semantics to most but its an important difference to us.

I'm not making a judgement call - I'm curious about the mechanics.
The mechanics vary but usually, she finds out a girl is bi and we get to know her if we dont already. We make sure we all like each other and then go from there. We are picky about who so it usually only happens a few times a year. Finding someone that is bi, likes both of us and we both like of her takes time. In 7 years of being with my wife (just over 4 married), I think we have been with around 15 different girls.
 

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My neighbors have been doing it for years. Except they actually have an "open" relationship. I've heard both sides of it, from him and her, and it works out perfectly (for them). It's not like they're always "on the hunt", but it happens every now and then--typically with coworkers. And it's not just having a "third party" over every now and then, it's actually an open relationship.

They do have some very strict rules for it that protect them both.
 

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What does his wife do where she randomly and almost consistently runs into these type of third partiess?!
 
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